Is your country drying of late-stage capitalism? 

Struggling to unite a suffering population after driving a culture wedge between them?

Has the result been a slew of corrupt political pigs that are so entrenched in the team sport mentality that they refuse to pass meaningful legislation that works for all its citizens?

Then you need War! 

War is sexy, hip and with the right amount of manufactured consent can be the bi-partisan you need to raise your favorability before election season. 

Under a common enemy, the taste of blood will wash away the reality of a conservative right that is inching ever closer to throwing religious freedom out the window and enacting a Christo-fascist ethnostate (literal Gilead!)  in the “land of the free.” 

So push that conflict overseas. Back those right-wing militias with neo-Nazi roots, and if that’s not enough, simply send private mercenary groups to do the dirty work for you. 

The closer you get to World War Three the better!

So try it now before it’s too late! Your satisfaction is guaranteed or if you’re lucky enough to survive the nuclear holocaust, your next war crime is free!