Tag: america
Fun Activities For When Your Sunburn Is So Bad You Think You Might Have To Throw Up
If you’re like me, you’ve been having a lot of fun in the sun! Unfortunately, due to the sedatives you were under the influence of, you probably forgot to use sunscreen. Now you’re as red as a Maine lobster! No worries, babe. Here are some fun activities for when your sunburn is so bad you feel like you need to jump off an 8-story building. … Continue reading Fun Activities For When Your Sunburn Is So Bad You Think You Might Have To Throw Up
Tennessee Governor Bill Lee is Actually A Drag Icon
In this stifling political climate, Bill Lee, governor of Tennessee, has signed numerous bills that seek to place bans on drag queens in Tennessee. The impact of these bills is major for the LGBTQ+ community– beyond limiting drag performances, the bill ultimately targets and criminalizes transness within the state. However, the story runs deeper. While Bill Lee looks like every other straight, white, dusty, old … Continue reading Tennessee Governor Bill Lee is Actually A Drag Icon
Marjorie Taylor Greene is Enjoying Kevin McCarthy’s Chapstick
Marjorie Taylor Greene’s Kinky Plans for Kevin McCarthy’s Used Chapstick “At first when I bought it I thought they meant his penis,” Greene told reporters after the purchase. “I’ve seen his penis on multiple occasions and I would always compare it to a little tube of chapstick so when the auctioneer said ‘Kevin McCarthy’s used chapstick, $100,000’ I dove on it.” The chapstick was in … Continue reading Marjorie Taylor Greene is Enjoying Kevin McCarthy’s Chapstick
Don’t Cry When I’m Dead
“If you want to break up with me, fine. But, don’t cry when me and my Uber passengers die in a crash.” Continue reading Don’t Cry When I’m Dead
Leaked Emails Reveal Mickey Mouse Clapped Ron DeSantis’ Wife’s Cheeks
According to the emails allegedly exchanged between Mrs. DeSantis and Mickey, the two had been “clapping” her “fucking cheeks” for several months. The messages contained explicit details of their encounters, including one particularly scandalous rendezvous in the Magic Kingdom after hours where she and Ron got pregnant with the mouse’s baby and needed an abortion that halted the six-week abortion ban bill on the governor’s … Continue reading Leaked Emails Reveal Mickey Mouse Clapped Ron DeSantis’ Wife’s Cheeks
Home Schooled Kids
“Horny like home schooled kids at the church dance.” Continue reading Home Schooled Kids
Aaron Rodgers coming to New York after demands met
After months of speculation and rumors, 4-time NFL MVP Aaron Rodgers has officially been traded to the New York Jets. The deal was long coming and quite costly for the Jets. Gang-green would not only have to swap their first round pick with the Packers in the upcoming NFL draft, but they will also part ways with the 42nd pick, the 207th, a 2024 conditional … Continue reading Aaron Rodgers coming to New York after demands met
Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Kicks Off Presidential Run By Contracting Smallpox
Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the son of former assassinated senator Robert F. Kennedy has officially thrown his hat in the ring for the 2024 presidential race. Following in the footsteps of his famous political family, Kennedy Jr. has been a known activist for many causes, most notably advocating against vaccinations. Kennedy Jr. did not try to soften his anti-vax stance but instead doubled down on … Continue reading Robert F. Kennedy Jr. Kicks Off Presidential Run By Contracting Smallpox
Tender Meat
“This prime rib is so tender, it melts in your mouth.” Continue reading Tender Meat