Tag: donald trump

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Donald Trump Already Dead and Replaced with Clone

New documents obtained from inside the deep state reveal that Former/Current Donald Trump has been killed by the United States Shadow Government and has been replaced by a clone! The biological being surrendering themselves to the Fulton County Sheriff’s Office on August, 28th, 2023 is NOT, we repeat, IS NOT, the former president. It is a clone created by a semen sample stolen in his … Continue reading Donald Trump Already Dead and Replaced with Clone

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Trump and Associates Hold Meeting On His Virginia Golf Course

Twitter erupted on Sunday as former President Donald Trump arrived in Washington, D.C., seemingly plucked directly from the golf course, still dawning his golf cleats. Questions quickly arose surrounding the choice of attire, sparking rumors of medical issues or an indictment.  But the internet went absolutely feral when Trump, his son Eric, and a few other rotund conservative swine, were caught on camera riding out … Continue reading Trump and Associates Hold Meeting On His Virginia Golf Course

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Why Ron DeSantis Always Wears a Suit

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis is known not only for being an ideological fascist clown but for dressing like one too. His horrendously tacky navy blue suits do an excellent job of showing how he relates to the everyman. Because there’s no other way to choose a suit that is simultaneously too tight and falling off your body other than being a fucking idiot.  Thankfully, the … Continue reading Why Ron DeSantis Always Wears a Suit

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Mike Pence Confirms, The Secret Service Will Kill You

In a recent revelation by the January 6th Committee, Mike Pence, unable to access his office due to a “security malfunction,” refused to leave the capital with his secret service on the day of the insurrection. Because he thought they were going to fucking wack him, stating, “I’m not getting in that car.” But further witness testimony revealed a more extended quote from Vice President … Continue reading Mike Pence Confirms, The Secret Service Will Kill You

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White Woman Believes Men And Women Aren’t Equal

“Men and women aren’t equal. Women are too emotional to make logical decisions, and that’s why they can’t be leaders,” explains Becky Bootlicker to a captive audience at her work happy hour. “I know because I come from a family of strong men. My dad and brother put their lives on this country every day protecting poppy and oil fields in the Middle East, and … Continue reading White Woman Believes Men And Women Aren’t Equal

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Donald Jr Releasing New Book

Hey guys, Don Jr. here. I hope you’re out there owning the libs and cheering on Brandon!  While you’re out there being patriots, supporting your officers, and uplifting our white supremacist system, Biden, AOC, and the rest of the radical left socialist commies are trying to stop the release of my latest book, How to Inspire Domestic Terrorists.  BUT THEY CAN’T STOP AMERICAN FREEDOM! You … Continue reading Donald Jr Releasing New Book

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Horoscopes: November 2020

Aries: You may feel like a snail emerging from its shell.But, that’s just a dull illusion of a twisted reality. Quit your job and NEVER LEAVE HOME AGAIN. Taurus: Your boisterous, generous attitude is inspiring and welcomed by others. Who does that bitch Kathy at the office think she is to turn her nose up to your homemade queso? She can go right along and … Continue reading Horoscopes: November 2020

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